Brown's Alleged Abusive Behavior Is Familiar To Many Men

CLEVELAND - I don't condone violence against anyone, least of all females. I do however, understand how sometimes, a person can be pushed to the breaking point.

Which brings me to Chris Brown.

Brown, the 19-year old mega popular teen idol/singer has been getting an enormous amount of negative media attention of late. Allegedly, Brown physically abused his girlfriend, fellow R&B singer Rihanna last weekend in Los Angeles. Exact details remain very sketchy, but a plethora of media reports have painted the famously easy going and "super nice guy" Brown as a raging maniac that abuses women.

Unfair.

Look, I don't know if he assaulted Rihanna or not. But if he did, I think people should at least try to see this incident from more than just the "no man should ever put his hands on a woman" perspective. I know from experience that sometimes, a woman will so skillfully push a man's buttons, that he often loses control and impulsively thrashes the female.

Take one of my experiences for example.

My first girlfriend was addicted to cigarettes. I had briefly gotten into a position of being able to get cartons of them for free, but sometimes I wouldn't give her any because she smoked them so excessively. She became enraged that I wouldn't cave and give her yet another pack. This led to a ridiculous level of stubbornness from her. One day, I had to run a few errands and our 1-year old child was going to stay home with her. The woman was so unreasonable that she threatened to just let the baby do whatever she wanted because she (the girlfriend) decided that she needed a nap without her cigarettes.

She told me that whatever the baby did or got into while I was gone was going to be my fault because I wouldn't give her cigarettes to "keep her awake." Of course, I felt she was just bluffing and wasn't really going to neglect her child for something so petty.

So, I left to run my errands.

When I returned home, the first thing I noticed was many things from inside of our apartment laying in the bushes below our balcony (we lived on the 3rd floor). I stepped into the door of our place and it was not only a mess, but the baby had the balcony door open and had many of her diapers, toys and other items on the balcony ready to be tossed down below with the other things.

My girl was asleep amidst all of this nonsense.

When I woke her up, she made excuses and blamed my leaving for what our child had done. As far as I was concerned, my thinking was; forget the things she ditched over the balcony. She could have slipped through the rails and fell to her death (or been severely injured), all because of her mother's spitefulness.

But I would have been wrong if I would've put my hands on the woman.

My point is, a situation as ridiculous as that can easily prompt a guy to lose his mind and beat the brakes off a chick. If it were reversed and I was the one that let the baby do all of that, she would have been within her rights to punch, kick, slap or back hand me. I would have deserved it.

Some guys abuse women for dumb reasons. Ego. Power. Sick thrill or fetish. Those are the type of guys that I would say are wrong. But believe me, there are legitimate reasons for hitting anyone. The trick is to avoid being in those situations and being with people that try to test you.

Bottom line, I don't know if Chris Brown did what they say he did. But if he did, there is a good possibility that maybe just maybe he had a good reason for doing it.

Or maybe he didn't.